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I started playing organized soccer when I was 5 years old, and played my last competitive game when I was 22.
In those 17 years - I played on nationally ranked club teams, I played in prestigious tournaments, earned first team All-District honors multiple years in high school (back when you could play high school soccer), and even lettered as a Freshman at an NCAA collegiate soccer program.
According to the NCAA that puts me in the top 6% of all males who participated in high school soccer. If you consider the total population of kids who participated in youth soccer at all, that percentage moves closer to 1%.
Despite that, I never made a single dollar as a soccer player.
In fact, after playing collegiately my Freshman year, I transferred to another university without an NCAA program and finished out my playing days on the intercollegiate club team.
How does someone go from playing at the top levels of youth soccer to hanging up their cleats before even finishing a full college career? As someone who aspired to be a pro player, spent thousands of hours training, and ticked a lot of the boxes on the “right” path, I’ve thought a lot about what could have made the difference.
Here, I’m sharing the six hard-learned lessons from my journey—what I wish I’d done differently and what I advise any young player with the same dream. These are the realities I learned too late but that could mean everything for the next generation striving to make it in this game.
1. Lack of Focus on Technical Development
In youth soccer, it’s easy to get swept up in team tactics and athleticism. As a young player, I was fast and strong, and I thought that would be enough. I loved playing aggressive, high-energy soccer, and my coaches encouraged it. But when I went up against the truly elite players, I saw the gap—they were light years ahead technically. Their touch on the ball, their dribbling control, their passing precision were so sharp it was like they were playing a different game.
If your child isn’t spending hours on the fundamentals, they’re missing the foundation for long-term success. It isn’t just about speed or strength—it’s about what they can do with the ball under pressure. Encourage them to spend hours working on ball control, their weaker foot, and first touches. Building a habit of consistent, focused technical work early on can make all the difference when the athletic playing field starts to even out.
2. Choosing the Best Team Over the Best Coach
Growing up, I always wanted to play for the "top" team. I thought being on a winning team would give me the best chance to get noticed and improve. I joined teams with flashy records, and sometimes we did well. But looking back, I realize I often played under coaches who prioritized the team’s reputation over my individual development. They didn’t break down my weaknesses, push me in training, or guide me in what it takes to excel at the next level.
The right coach is worth more than any team ranking. I learned this too late, but the best coaches truly care about player development. They’re not just looking for short-term wins; they’re invested in making each player better. If your child is chasing a title but missing out on real mentorship, they could be sacrificing their potential. Look for a coach who knows how to push your child and help them grow. The best coaches will make them feel challenged every practice, not just comfortable.
3. Not Watching Enough High-Level Soccer
As a kid, I loved playing soccer, but I didn’t watch the game much. Sure, I caught the occasional World Cup game, but I didn’t immerse myself in it. I didn’t analyze the flow of professional matches, the spacing, or the off-the-ball movement. I didn’t understand the tactics behind each play. When I started playing against players who did, it showed—they anticipated movements and adapted to situations in ways I couldn’t.
Watching high-level soccer is like a master class in the game’s finer points. Encourage your child to watch full games, not just highlight reels. There’s so much to learn by seeing how pros navigate pressure, adjust tactics, and communicate on the field. This tactical insight can make a big difference, especially when they get to a level where raw talent alone isn’t enough. I wish I had developed this understanding earlier; it would have made me a smarter, more adaptable player.
4. Neglecting Mobility, Recovery, and Nutrition
Youth sports often glorify the idea of grinding through pain. I remember feeling proud of playing through injuries, never realizing how much it could cost me. But as the seasons added up, I started experiencing nagging issues—stiffness, pain, and recurring injuries that likely could have been avoided with better recovery routines. I didn’t stretch enough, didn’t understand the value of rest days, and ate whatever I wanted. These choices eventually caught up with me.
Taking care of the body off the field is as important as performing on it. I’ve seen countless young players get sidelined by avoidable injuries, simply because they didn’t prioritize recovery, mobility work, or nutrition. Flexibility, proper hydration, balanced meals, and rest days aren’t luxuries—they’re necessary investments in a long soccer career. Help your child develop good habits around nutrition, sleep, and recovery early on. It’s one of the most overlooked aspects of training but can be a game-changer in terms of longevity and performance.
5. Not Willing to Make Social Sacrifices
The path to becoming a professional athlete is demanding, and it requires sacrifice. As a teenager, I didn’t want to give up my social life. I wanted to go to parties, hang out with friends, and be a “normal” kid. Looking back, there were many weekends when I chose fun over extra training. I missed sessions that could have pushed me further. Balancing life is important, but at the professional level, every choice matters.
If your child is serious about soccer, they’ll need to prioritize their sport over social events, at least some of the time. This doesn’t mean giving up everything, but it does mean choosing soccer when it counts. Encourage them to see these choices as investments in their future. Social events will always be there, but the window to go pro is small. The players who make it often make a few sacrifices along the way, and those choices can make all the difference.
6. Poor Understanding of the Recruiting Process
I assumed that if I played well, opportunities would come to me. I thought college coaches or scouts would naturally find me. I couldn’t have been more wrong. When I finally started understanding the recruiting process, I realized how much groundwork is necessary. By then, it was almost too late. The players who succeed are proactive—they reach out to coaches, build relationships, and take steps to make themselves visible.If your child dreams of playing in college or beyond, they can’t rely on luck or talent alone. Educate yourselves early about the recruiting process. Help them put together a highlight reel, attend ID camps, and make connections with coaches. And don’t wait until senior year—start as early as possible. Understanding the system and taking action can be the difference between getting noticed and being overlooked.
Conclusion
Seventeen years of playing soccer taught me more than just how to pass, shoot, and compete''it taught me hard truths about what it really takes to reach the highest levels of the game. Looking back, I don't regret my journey, but I do wish I had known then what I know now.
The reality is, talent alone isn't enough. The players who make it aren’t always the most naturally gifted, they're the ones who consistently refine their technical skills, seek out the best coaching, study the game like a student, take care of their bodies, make sacrifices, and actively navigate the recruiting process.
If you’re a young player with dreams of going pro, or a parent trying to help your child reach their potential, learn from my experience. Make deliberate choices, focus on the things that truly matter, and take control of your own path. Because in the end, the difference between those who make it and those who don’t often comes down to what they do outside of the 90 minutes on the field.
